This Thing Called Life by Ki O’Shea

Anthony loves to thrift. My dad use to love going to yard sales. I don’t. When I look at Anthony’s “fits” (that’s what they call their outfits now), they are always “him.” His is eccentric and he likes what he likes.

His tees make me laugh because although most of them come from thrift shops and are old school shirts, they fit his personality very much. He is my unique child . He does what he wants to do. He never tries to fit in and I love that about him. He has the perfect combination of his dad and I.

I texted him yesterday to ask what he wanted to do for dinner. We eventually turned the text into a phone call because it was easier. He met Sedi and I out for dinner. When he walked in, he lit up the room. It’s his entire being and he came in with just a breast cancer t-shirt on with basketball shorts and I believe a pair of vans.

Sedi will more than likely be the same way. It seems God continues to place people in my life to remind me that while she has medical challenges, she will be ok. We walked into the restaurant about ten minutes before Anthony. An older woman and a younger male sat behind where we were sitting. Ms. Nancy is her name. She complimented Sedinam, asked her age and marveled at her background. She is still tiny to be two. My friends remind me that I’ve always been pretty small too. But she is an entirely different level of small. But she thrives. The young man Daniel that was with the woman was about my age or slightly younger. He has cerebral palsy he shared with me.. it’s a strong possibility that Sedi will also have “CP.” he has his masters degree in counseling, he comes from a single parent home because his dad was not a very good person; an alcoholic he said. He said he is a twin. His mom is his biggest cheerleader and he told me to never allow Sedi to believe that she cannot.

This is the fourth person that God sent to remind me of this. She likes to be in control. I let her hold my hand and lead me. She is learning to walk and her walking and crawling is unique. Every pair of pants that she has, has a hole in only one of the knees. It’s because that’s her way of getting to her destination; on that knee.

Before Ms. Nancy left, she whispered in my ear and told me how blessed I was to have to kids who are just beautiful people. She said it’s not just the physical, but she felt their auras. I do too. Sedinam is in my bed right this moment. Y’all, she sleeps in her crib 95 percent of the time, but the last two mornings, she has been hungry earlier, so I put her on her feeding tube and let her lay beside me. She takes up the entire bed! I’m still trying to figure out how an 18 pound little girl needs so much space. But as I lay beside her and listen to her breathe and watch her, I am aware of just how special she is. I’m aware that God allowed us both to go through this journey to remind me that He has me. I’m aware that we all are unique because I have faith and the tenacity to get up, show out, and continue on this journey called life. I listened to my sermon yesterday and as I listened, I teared up so much because I am that person that Bishop described. I am that crayon. Anthony and Sedi are too. The difference is, they are just at the beginning of their race and while it’s been hard, they have the youthfulness to just get up and keep going.

Sedi feel back yesterday and hit her head. I automatically jumped up, grabbed her and rubbed her. She held on to my fingers and let me kiss her face. I spoke to her in a quiet endearing way to let her know she will be ok. Her cries stopped and she held my finger and just rubbed it. At 1 pound, 2 pounds, and every pound that she has gained over her two years, this has been her norm. She knows mommy is there and despite her unique size, she still gets back up and still pushes herself because mommy cheers her own.

We are a unique, special family and I’m blessed. In the middle of the night I received a text from someone and it made me laugh because it reminds me of the unique situation I am in currently….

To be unique is… to be different. It’s to accept your circumstances and make the best out of them.

I embrace it all and accept all of the challenges…